A Poem

I do not do well with chaos.
I cannot embrace it
like some say moms should.
I will not accept chaos as my reality.
I don't need perfection
but I do need routine
just as much as they say babies do
as much as they say children do.
Without it
my heart starts racing.
I get frustrated
and want to scream.
I want to be irrational
and throw a pity party
and I'll cry if I want to.

I just need to find a new normal
a rhythm.
I need to find what works for me
for them
for us.
Then I need to be flexible
but not so much it breaks my new plan.
I'll leave room for growth
but not chaos.
I'm done with that
Starting tomorrow
for sure.

This poem is brought to you by an
well that last one really isn't true
but it feels that way sometimes
anyway a teacher
who when she leaves work
goes home
and tries to be a mom
to an infant
and a toddler
and also tries to be a wife
and a suzy homemaker
and everything to everybody
because God has called me to this
this reality
and most days
I love it.
And others
I'm just tired.
Too tired to write prose.
So here is this

Thank you God for free verse.