Today... in 3 parts

Part I - 1:50pm
I'm a mess right now.  I've been waiting for the doctor's office to call about my hcg and progesterone levels based on the blood they took yesterday.  It was almost 1:30pm, and I could bear the wait no longer, so I called.  The receptionist said she would have the nurse call me back in a little bit.  I'm still waiting...

I figured I'd work out some of my emotions blogging while I wait for the call, and, I must say, I'm surprised I've got so much anxiety about this.  I really do believe this is our rainbow!  All will be fine!!  But there's always this nagging doubt that creeps into my thoughts that something could be wrong.

And something could be, but I'm sure it won't be.  Ugh!  I just need her to call and say it looks good!!!  This prometrium I've been taking causes some back pain and occasional cramping - I've been told it's really common - but it freaks me out.  Why isn't she calling me back!?!?!?!

I've got laundry done, sweet potatoes for tomorrow... I had planned to grade some papers, but I just can't make myself do it.  Instead? I'm torturing myself by watching A Baby Story on TLC.  You know that program?  WHY AM I WATCHING THIS?!  Why does anyone watch this?!

The woman pushes, the baby pops out, and I cry.  I should turn this off... Yet, something in me wants to keep watching... weird.

Part II - 2:30
To take my mind off the impending phone call, I started work on my new crafty project that will end up being a way to memorialize my Angel and other BLM's babies.  I can't wait to send you each one of these!  Can you guess what it is I'm making? hehe

Part III - 4:03pm
They didn't call me back.  I called again and got the answering service.  They closed early for the holiday.  I just want to cry.  I guess there is a chance they could still call... probably not. And so I'm left to sit and worry.  I - just - want - to - cry!  And there's probably nothing wrong.  I just needed to hear that.

I'm so flippin mad right now I can't see straight!!!!!


  1. oh honey....Im sorry they have not called you back. I cant stand when they do that especially for something so important... hugs!!

    as for your project, I cant wait to see what it is!! Ill probably request one :)

  2. That just stinks ~ but maybe with the holiday they are overwhelmed and didn't have time to test. Just a thought. Not that it makes it better.

    I would have to guess paper mache.

  3. That is so freaking rude! How crappy of them. If I were you I would give them a piece of my mind come Friday! Totally psyched about your project - I will love whatever you make for my Riley & Peyton :) I agree with Stephanie - paper mache - not sure on what though ;)
    Thanks for your sweet blog comment hon! Sadly I live far from you. In NY near Niagara Falls, Buffalo, you know way up by Canada. :*( SO virtual hugs it is ;)
    Much love to you <3 Let me know when you find out <3 ALSO - we should be friends on Facebook!

  4. I can't figure out your project but im horribly uncrafty. Congrats on the new little one :)